My dad’s health has rapidly declined in the past few weeks, to the point now where he is on hospice. The incredible young men in the ward have been bringing the sacrament to the home for a few weeks. Today as my dad struggled with a painful cough during the prayer, my wiggly 4-year-old son on my lap was struggling to be reverent, I could hear my mom struggling to muffle her crying, & I was struggling with feelings about my dad & daughter’s current health. In that moment and awareness of all that was going on just in that room, in our family, in my heart... & knowing for each individual on both sides of the veil the atonement is at work at the same time & with equal love and power... the words of the sacrament prayer pierced parts of my soul I didn’t know were there.
How diverse we all are, yet we need the atonement of Jesus Christ EQUALLY. No matter how knowledgeable, righteous, or healthy we may seem, we NEED His wisdom, forgiveness, & healing infinitely. The sacrament is our weekly reminder of & access to His love, mercy, power, grace, & embrace.
I have a strong conviction that adversity & the accompanying strong emotions, when filtered through the lens of the gospel, bring sacred experiences, insights, & even power into our lives. For that reason alone, I have to humbly bow and thank Heavenly Father for my trials because of all they teach me. It is a miracle as I surrender any inclination that I can do anything on my own besides CHOOSE to depend on & follow HIM. My broken heart is more promptly changed as I come to depend so fully on He who is mighty to save & eager to comfort me... yes, even me. And you.